Welcome to another installment of Retro Weekend, the weekly feature where I play a classic game and write whatever I want about it! This week, I played a bunch of different Jurassic Park games on consoles ranging from the NES to the Game Boy Advance. What I found was a huge variety in gameplay, some rocking music I never expected to hear, and some bad nostalgia for the Super Nintendo game that can be traced back to the game whooping my butt as a kid. So enough talk, let’s take a tour of the video games of Jurassic Park.

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Welcome to Jurassic Park, lost land of the dinosaurs! For centuries, man has only dreamed of what came before him. We’ve studied fossils, bones, geographical climate changes, and DNA for years trying to piece together the world that was once a mystery to us. Well, there’s been a breakthrough. Using the most advanced government technology available, the age of dinosaurs is no longer chained to history. With the materials available to us, we’ve been able to extract the core elements of the DNA that made up these reptiles and replicate them with near-perfect results. They are living, breathing, ancient beasts, and they await all of you at the gates of Jurassic Park! Come join what will be your life’s greatest adventure as you tour the park, taking in a variety of exotic attractions and walking among Earth’s most amazing animals in history: the dinosaurs!

First Stop – Jurassic Park on the NES and SNES

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Here, enjoy the luxury of exploring a vast area of the park at your leisure. There’s plenty to see here, including an extraordinary amount of dinosaurs eggs that you’ll be able to take with you for the rest of your visit. Just be careful Mommy doesn’t see you! This attraction is full of danger – like an obstacle course, really – as you’ll have to avoid getting zapped by electrical floors, traps, and of course, the mighty T. Rex you’ll eventually come face to face with. Enjoy both indoor and outdoor activity with a wide range of animal and environmental interactions. Don’t worry, stay strong and you’ll make your way through to the end in only a few short hours!

Second Stop – Jurassic Park on the Game Gear

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There’s nothing better than a good chase, and here at Jurassic Park, we’ll give you the ride of your life. Step into our unique Rover that’s been equipped with top-of-the-line auto parts for your chance to outrun some of our most famous dinosaurs, including the triceratops and the velociraptor. After you leave those gigantic monsters in the dust, take leave of your vehicle to track down one more dinosaur you can engage with in one epic head-to-head battle! Fun for the whole family!

Third Stop – Jurassic Park: Rampage Edition on the Sega Genesis

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One of my favorites here at the park is also one of the most difficult attractions to see through. This new attraction is still being worked on, so the visuals are a bit rough; however, this is the only place you can go to get a whole new experience with the dinosaurs. In this Rampage Edition, you’ll be able to ride dinosaurs! That’s right, this attraction is the only place you’ll be able to hop on top of a triceratops or gallimimus and have one of the most exciting rides ever. Stomp through the park at your own pace, or completely rush through at the beast’s top speed. The choice is yours. You may even get a chance to fly along with a Pterodactyl if you’re lucky!

The second part of this crazy stop is the ability to step into the shoes – metaphorically, people – of a real live raptor! You’ll be able to hunt your prey just like those feisty creatures, stalk, and destroy all that’s in your path. You may not be as tall as the mighty T. Rex, but these raptors make up for it with inhuman speed and ferocious claws. Rampage Edition is your one stop shop for a whole new level of dinosaur interaction!

Fourth Stop – Jurassic Park III: Park Builder on the Game Boy Advance

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For those who are really interested in the logistics behind Jurassic Park, the Park Builder is a must-see. Let me be clear, this is not simply about looking at some charts, telling some workers to wash the dinosaurs, turning the lights on and off, and going home. There’s a lot of fun and exciting decisions to make, and you’ll be able to feel the joy of watching your park come to life, full of happy visitors.

We give every participant a slab of land and let them run wild. You’ll be able to place roads, vegetation, your very own attractions, food stalls, and more with a very simple point-and-click interface. Not only that, but you’ll gain access to all the behind-the-scenes workings of the park including excavation of fossils, DNA manipulation, breeding, and hatching! Before you know it, you’ll be a dino pro. Just don’t run out of money or the power will shut off, and we don’t need another incident like that again…

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Jurassic Park is one of the largest parks on Earth with dozens of attractions and hundreds of different species of dinosaurs. There’s so much here that we can’t possible cover everything you’ll see in your visit, but hey, why would we? We want there to be a few surprises for you when you stay! Though the ticket prices are high, there’s simply no other place in the world that will offer as much adventure and excitement as Jurassic Park. One attraction will make you forget even the most exhilarating rollercoasters or thrill rides. So get your tickets today before they’re gone and enjoy the world of the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park!